Noah was diagnosed with Severe ADHD and ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) in December. We are not at all surprised by this diagnosis, but in a way, I hoped they might say that his behavior is fairly normal for a boy his age---they didn't. Instead they referred him to a psychiatrist on an emergency basis. They actually used the word emergency in their letter.
In our hearts, we knew that no amount of "talk therapy" or parenting classes would help our boy. We have tried everything. I could go into lots more detail, but to be honest, I'm quite tired of having to explain myself and our actions to everyone else. Explaining his actions becomes exhausting and it just makes me sad.
So, in short, we have started down the path of medications. Christian was EXTREMELY resistant to this for a long time. He finally realized that Noah's behaviors were affecting every aspect of our lives. Our daughter never had peace in our home (no one did, for that matter), we had stopped attending church because he was hurting kids in Sunday school, we were in marriage counseling because of differing opinions on how to discipline (when none of the discipline worked anyway), and Noah was having problems at school. Every aspect of our lives was affected. So Christian finally admitted that yes, we have tried everything...what's the next step?
So this is our next step. Trying medication after medication. We have seen some good things, but not a day goes by where we don't question, deep inside. We feel like this is what is best. It's not perfect, but it's best right now.
I have been thinking about God and how much he loves us, as his children. My love for Noah is immeasurable, and then I think of God. And I am reminded that Noah is a gift for me to care for, but ultimately he is God's. And I need to try and let go of controlling everything and find rest in the Lord.
I am an organized person and I have things planned out, always. But our life seems to have really taken a turn lately. Christian and I are united as a couple, and we are both on the same page, and that feels good. But others don't agree with our decisions and don't support us, and that makes things really hard. There comes a point where you have to just loosen a relationship and let it go a little in order for your family to be ok and for you to support each other as two married people. And that's what we've had to do, which has not been easy. Who in the world could think that we wouldn't make the best decisions for our children? We have agonized, prayed, cried, prayed, sought counsel...I just don't understand how others can question a parent's decision. If you came into our home, you would see the love and that we only want what is best for our kids.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh goodness. If anyone has any resources on connecting with other parents of kids with ADHD, I would love to get some more info. We are trying to learn as much as we can, and it would be much appreciated!
Xoxo...
